My Focus is Off: 15 Minutes of Fame....or Not (from previous blog)

My friends and I were talking today about embarrassing childhood memories. It was quite entertaining as well as humiliating as more and more embarrassing events kept coming to mind. What was comforting is that one of the friends I was talking with had actually gone through some very similar experiences in his childhood. Because the conversation was so enjoyable, mostly at my expense, I decided to share it with whoever may be reading this.

The focus of our conversation was our childhood experiences as members of a band. When I was about 10 I had a very strong desire to be in a band. Despite my lack of ability in the song writing department, I was determined to come up with Christian lyrics to as many songs as I possibly could. And I didn't stop there, I also composed every song I wrote (It isn't everyone who can do that successfully at age 10) using only 5 keys on my keyboard (so that I could play comfortably with one hand). I really was quite proud of myself, being only 10, and still having managed to become a song writer and composer. I was quite talented compared to the rest of my peer group.

I didn't come from a musical background. The only instrument I owned was my keyboard, which I had unsuccessfully attempted to figure out on several occasions. I had a hand-me-down stereo system which had previously belonged to my parents, a few blank cassette tapes, my brother's broken headset, and a computer microphone. The headset's sole purpose was to make me look like I was in a recording studio (like I had seen in a Hanson video). Because I didn't feel that my possessions would suffice for a band of two or more members, I began saving up money which I would spend on additional musical instruments. Because I was set on being a drummer, my parents bought me an electronic mini drum set as a birthday gift. I invested nearly all of my money on products I found in my Musician's Friend magazines. To my collection I added one additional microphone, a microphone stand and boom, an extra set of drumsticks, 2 tambourines, a shaky egg thing, and a multicolored strobe light. I also borrowed my parents’ headset/microphone combinations (as was becoming popular for famous musicians to wear during concert performances). I was set. Only one thing was missing....people for my band.

I lived 20 minutes away from almost all of my friends and, being 10, I didn't yet drive. But I wasn't about to let that minor complication stand in my way. Being that I was hoping for a band with more than one member, I began the search to see who was best qualified for the positions that needed to be filled. The role of drummer and lead singer was filled from day one. Though I had no musical ability of any kind (including the ability to carry a tune), I felt that I was more than qualified for this position. I only needed someone to play the keyboard and another member to play the guitar, or if they weren't skilled in that area, the tambourine or even the egg. I filled these roles with various people for weeks at a time. Each time there was a new member, the name of the band would change. SonLight, God Sent, Daisy, The Lord Exists...and I'm sure the list goes on.

Along with each new name came a new photo shoot. Sometimes my fellow band members and I wore matching outfits. Our poses were generally based on something we had seen in the last issue of TeenBeat magazine. Because publicity was so important, I worked overtime to write up articles about the band members from an objective, 3^rd person point of view. I was planning on eventually publishing a magazine that would provide our band with a decent amount of exposure. I made multiple magazine covers on Microsoft Word with our band’s pic front and center. I also had each band member fill out the Q&A sheet I came up with. On it were questions such as “What types of foods do you hate?”, “What musical artist has been most influential on your growth as a musician?”, and “What advice do you have for other musicians who would like to start a band?” On one occasion my band signed t-shirts we were giving out as the grand prize for successful submission of a band-themed word scramble from our unpublished magazine. 

Though none of my bands ever had a fan base, we never performed for anyone (other than immediate family), and the song lyrics have since been forgotten, I was sure I had it all together when I was 10. I don’t keep in touch with my former band mates and I have yet to acquire any musical ability. But for a while, this was my obsession. It consumed my thoughts day and night. I have since moved on from my band days. My thoughts are now filled with more grown-up obsessions in place of my childish ambition to be the lead singer of a band. But just how nothing significant ever came of my music phase, much of what I’m doing now will be of no eternal value. It’s easy to get stressed about school (or work) without ever realizing that this isn’t everything. In fact, it isn’t anything. Everything we experience on this earth is temporary. The only thing I can do that will have any eternal significance is glorifying God and allowing Him to use me to further His Kingdom. It’s so easy to lose this mindset and get caught up thinking that what I’m doing is somehow of great importance. It’s easy to fall into the trap of being 10 and wanting nothing other than to have my own band. But eventually, only memories will remain and nothing will have been accomplished. 

“For bodily exercise profits a little, but godliness is profitable for all things, having promise of the life that now is and of that which is to come.” 1 Timothy 4:8