My Heart is Prone to Wander (from previous blog)

But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. -2 Peter 3:18 

I love this verse, but for many years I have had a lot of difficulty applying it to my life. I was saved 14 years ago and since then my relationship with God has been like a rollercoaster. There have been times when I clearly felt the presence of God in my life and times where I wondered where He was. But He has never left me; every time, it was me who wandered away from Him. And each time that I come back to Him, He is there with loving arms wide open waiting to embrace me. But why do I wander? 

I know that there is nothing better than to be in His will. But still, I feel the need to place myself in control. It always makes me sad when I look at where I am in my walk with God compared to new believers. Its been 14 years, but spiritually, I have never progressed out of infancy. 

Nothing I could possibly want for myself could ever compare to what God has in store for me. I want what He has for me, but I feel as though I am not allowing Him to give it to me. I want to grow, to be close to Him, to serve Him, to bring glory to His name, to desire nothing more than this.